My Life on the Chubby List: Fat Girl Survival Tips

Let us begin this potentially offensive blog post with the urban dictionary definition of a "chubster".


An overweight although confident, well-dressed and funny man or woman. They are seen as cool and desirable due to a magnetic personality that compensates for their perceived lack of physical attractiveness.

This was number four on the list but I chose it because it contained the least obvious grammatical and spelling errors. 

I chose this word to use in this blog because I feel it does describe me pretty well. I have always been a big girl but I have always been confident and while yes some people have of course expressed distaste about my size I don't feel I ever really missed out on anything due to it. And I sure as shit didn't miss out on any wonderful romantic experiences because I'm a fatty mcfatfat because if someone is going to pass up getting to know me for the simple fact that my weight is off putting to them then clearly it wouldn't have worked out anyhow. The only thing that is a real problem with my weight is that it is now so out of control that is affecting my health, bottom line.

That being said... again... uh hmm.. Let's move on! If you are or have ever been a chubster or even a shy lil' fatty you'll most likely be familiar with some of these but below is a list of some of the coping mechanisms and tricks I use to survive being a fat girl.

Fat Girl Survival Tips:

1. Fucking admit it! You don't have to go shouting "I'm a proud fatty!" from the roof tops but please bitches, admit at least to yourself that you're chubby. If you can't even do that you have bigger problems than your pant size; living in denial is more unhealthy than being overweight.

2. Wearing clothes that fit. I'm not talking about what Seventeen or InStyle mag says you should wear for your body type, eff dressing for your "body type" but it is important to wear clothing that is the correct size. Wear what makes you feel sexy, but don't wear something that is going to get a picture of you put on peopleofwalmart.com! We have all seen it, the fat girl in the halter top with the back titties or little miss tub tubs with a muffin top so huge it could feed a third world country bulging out of the top of her three sizes too small denim jeans. Dress for your size ladies, trust me it is much more becoming.

3. Don't give people any ammo. Don't let the fact that you are overweight consume you. If you're constantly talking about how much you have gained or better yet making excuses for it, that is all people will focus on when they talk to you. If you do bring it up be prepared for the conversation. Don't be offended if people then ask you questions about personal habits or make suggestions on how to lose some of the clearly unwanted lbs.

4. Be confident! Easier said then done sometimes but like I just said, weight does not define you! To most intelligent adults a great personality is more important than weight. A sense of humor and good conversation skills will probably get you more friends then being skinny alone, no one wants to be around debbie downer. 

5. Invest in a good body slimmer. These are under garments that hold you in and smooth out fat rolls. I know I've been talking all about being proud and it's the inside that counts yadda yadda... but the truth is there are things that can be done to boost confidence, like looking good in a outfit. I wear slimming shorts almost everyday for two main reasons; it smoothes out my tummy and more importantly if I am wearing a skirt it keeps my thighs from rubbing together! I was personally not blessed with thighs that don't touch and if you weren't either you know what I am talking about! There are tons of different styles of these things out there. (I will post some links of the bottom of this post.) There are some things to consider when purchasing these though. Getting the right size is really important! If you get a full body one the best way to put it on is by stepping into it, make sure you pee first though cause getting out of it is harder. If you go for the two piece style get a top that is long enough to overlap the bottoms otherwise the first time you lean over a little too far you're probably going to end up looking a little something like this: you know what I'm talking about!
I personally just wear the shorts and it works out great for me!


6. Also invest is a good bra. When I was first told that I was a 40D and needed the "big girl sizes" (yes that is actually what the sales lady said to me) I was 18 years old and I was devastated. I wanted to get the cute bras with the thin straps and fun prints; but no I needed the ugly "mom bras"! Well I tell you what, the first time I put on a bra that really fit I couldn't have cared less if the thing looked like freddy krueger's face! It was way more comfortable and flattering under my clothes. When it comes to bras good support is hard to find.


7. Tankinis and swim suit covers. 'nuff said! 


8. This is the most important one! So now we have admitted it, I'm a chubster. Now we own it; I'm a damn fine, intelligent, hilarious chubster!  Now surround yourself with people who love and support you. Don't date people who are trying to change you if you don't want to change. Do date someone who loves you for you but will support and help you if you decide to lose weight. DO NOT EVER LET SOMEONE MAKE YOU FEEL LIKE YOU DO NOT DESERVE BETTER. Ladies and gentlemen do not ever think that just because you are fat it means you cannot or do not deserve to be with a good person, everyone deserves to be treated right! And beyond just dating don't hang out with "friends" that make you feel bad about yourself either. Tell 'em off and ditch 'em; rude bitches are better left to pick each others' bones!


Tragic Personal Story Time: Rant Alert!
I use to be the fat girl in the group and my so called friends used me as the butt of every joke. They kept me around as their personal sounding board and punching bag. When it was one on one we were buds but when they were all together I was once again the odd one out. They were "popular" and the only girls I knew at my new school. One of the girls was bigger than me but that didn't seem to matter and another was the same size but unlike myself at that point she had figured out how to carry herself well. (I was still in the sit on the edge of the seat so your thighs don't spread out over the chair, suck it in 'til you can't breathe, wear a huge jacket ever chance you get phase; all to hide one dirty little secret: I'm not skinny!) For nearly an entire school year these girls picked on me and called me names to my face and behind my back. They made fun of me for dancing at school dances saying "If you have meat you shouldn't dance like that." They even teased me about other kids I talked to, like every time I mingled with kids they considered to be uncool they would threaten to stop talking to me if that was who I was going to socialize with. Eventually they stopped hanging around me all together and I gladly began hanging out with me "uncool" friends full time. At the time I think I was too young to really understand what was going on and how it was really affecting me but looking back now I understand better just strange the whole thing was. I feel being pushed out of that group was the best thing that ever happened to me. I never really fit in with those girls, weight aside I never really connected with them. After that year I learned a lot about myself and just started doing pretty much anything I wanted. It was like being ridiculed somehow gave me the freedom to just say fuck it, I'm clearly gonna get made fun of anyway may as well give 'em the total package. By the time I entered jr. high I was a whole new me. I was experimenting with new things, meeting new interesting people. The next three years would be super rough don't get me wrong; it was the beginning of a whole new set of demons but I was really coming into my own. On some small level I was finally  comfortable. I felt more comfy in my own skin walking the halls of an Oklahoma jr. high school in giant, black, baggy, pants with neon bondage straps and a tattered concert tee rocking blue hair and platform boots with my best friend at my side then I ever did prancing around in denim shorts and a pony tail surrounded by my "popular friends"! Now, I'm not saying all popular people are like that or that being in the preppy crowd is bad or lame or whatever. If that is what I was saying, well I wouldn't be much better than the girls that bullied me all those years ago. I'm just saying I was trying to fit myself into some kind of mold and it wasn't working for me. What I am saying is that no matter what size you are you have to be okay with who you are or life is going to far more difficult for you than it's meant to be. 


Okay, so we went way off the topic of just weight loss with this one but whatevs. It's all part of what got me to where I am now. I hope someone finds these insane ramblings to be helpful. Please tell me what you guys think and if it strikes you please share my blog! I would love to reach as many people as possible! Thanks for taking the time to read! 


Shapewear links:
http://www.spanx.com/home/index.jsp?camp=kw=s3z4kqrpW%7Cpcrid%7C11953337996%7Cspanx


http://www.dressbarn.com/accessories/shapewear-legwear
(I own the high waisted shaper short plus in black. Fun fact about that I have been wearing it in a 2x and recently had to purchase it in a 1x because mine is getting too big!)


http://www.maidenform.com/shapewear
(great bras too!)


http://www.soma.com/store/browse/shelf.jsp?cat=Shape+Shop+Smoothing+Light+Control&subCatId=cat4629279&catId=cat40091&CMP=KNC-GOOG_NB


http://www.jcpenney.com/jcp/XGN.aspx?DeptID=70659&CatID=71428&cm_mmc=Google-_-G_Lingerie-_-G_Lingerie_Shapewear-_-shapewear


Coming soon: My Life on the Chubby List: The fat skinny bitch, everyone's a critic!